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Stumbling on Creativity

11/3/2015

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CHAD MORRIS, Ph.D., DirectorMy stress is often linked to environmental noise. If while I’m driving, my two children argue over the existing road noise, I am quickly on sensory overload. I envy those individuals that seem blissfully unaffected by the surrounding cacophony. But while I might be more affected by the surrounding soundscape than others, noise pollution impacts many.
 
Noise is a source of stress that gets scant attention given its very real consequences. A large proportion of the world population lives in extremely noisy environments. The World Health Organization has called attention to this growing problem and how noise affects quality of life. Besides varying individual levels of annoyance and feelings of hopelessness, noise pollution is also tied to hypertension, cardiovascular disease, inadequate sleep, poor attention, and difficulty with problem-solving.
 
I am fortunate to have the ability to choose where I live and work. And over the years, I have gained some understanding about how environmental noise affects my mood. When immersed in sensory overload from noise, I can quickly move into a flight-or-fight stance. This autonomic response has recently been triggered by the traffic, including heavy machinery, that has been redirected down our street the last three months due to road construction. I have had to begin to identify ways to mitigate the related stress.
 
Like much of my personal wellness, awareness is a necessary tool. If I can identify mounting stress, I have options. Music has always been one way I have been able to navigate unwanted sounds. By focusing on harmony, I can override less desirable sounds. But I also find that a change of venue is simply needed. When possible, I remove myself from over-stimulating settings and situations. A brief reprieve from sensory overload does wonders. And living in an area conducive to getting outside for exercise is instrumental to my well-being and soothing to my senses.ere to edit.

borrowed from the September 14th Behavioral Health and Wellness Program Newsletter.
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Valliant House Recovery Color Run Sept. 19, 2015

9/22/2015

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McCurtain County Free Fair 2015

9/10/2015

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Thank you for the Blue Ribbon!
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Do I expect the best of others--and myself--today?

3/26/2015

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There is a proper balance between not asking enough of oneself and asking or expecting too much.
—May Sarton

The boy's mother baked pies that morning before he was up. She left them on the back porch to cool, their warm aroma curling up through his bedroom window. His mouth was full of the smell when he woke.

Before she left for work, she said, "You may do anything you want today, anything at all. Except for one thing - don't step in those pies."

All day the boy could not get the pies out of his mind; his feet itched just thinking about them.

Don't step in those pies. He heard her voice inside his head. By late afternoon he could control it no longer. One, two, three, four, five, six--his foot fell squarely into the middle of each pie.

When we expect the worst from others, we often get just that. The same goes for our expectations of ourselves. And when we trust others, it too is returned.

Do I expect the best of others--and myself--today?

                                                           

From Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.

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What little thing can I do to stand out from the crowd today?

3/14/2015

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Each man with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.
—Mark Twain

What does it mean to be different? How does it feel? Is it okay to act or look or be different from everyone else at times? Sometimes, maybe even most of the time, it feels safer to blend into the crowd. We don't want to stick out like a sore thumb. But sometimes it's when we are different that we discover new things no one has ever thought of or done before.

We don't want to spend our whole lives doing only what others do. And there are times when we must take a stand if what others are doing is wrong. Perhaps it's good practice to try to do some little thing differently once in a while, to stand out from the crowd, just to get used to it. We might even like it. After all, if no one ever dares to be different, how would our world ever change for the better?



From Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher.

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7 Things Grief Teaches You

2/10/2015

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7 Things Grief Teaches You
January 29, 2015 By Tracey Cleantis, author of The Next Happy

I know that when you are grieving that you likely you aren’t wanting to see any value in the experience, and I am not a big fan of prematurely turning lemons into lemonade (I prefer turning the lemons into something more satisfying, like lemon cake or something that takes time, effort and a little more than just adding sugar, sunshine and premature positivity to the situation). That said, even though it doesn’t make the grief worth it( nothing does) grief teaches you some things that you might not learn otherwise.  Before we review grief’s unintentional curriculum, let me remind you that not all of the lessons are easy to learn--- yet they are still valuable and worth learning, unlike maybe algebra or geometry. Okay, let’s review grief’s inadvertent lesson plan.

1. Small stuff mattersWhen you have lost a loved one, a relationship or a dream, it really makes the stuff that seems so important not seem as important; grief and loss teaches you perspective in a way that an art course never could. All of a sudden you really get that it is all about the small moments, the simple pleasures and that as much as we are all seeking the big-ticket moments of life, it is the small stuff that really matters. I miss, more than I can tell you, the joys of playing gin rummy with my grandmother. Remembering how much I treasure that time with her makes me more likely to treasure those kind of moments with people in my here and now.

2. You find out who your friends really areWhen we are in grief it can make some people around us really uncomfortable. Grief is hard and it can be really hard for those around us to see us in it, they may want us to “turn our frown upside down” or “see the bright side” when there isn’t a bright side. You may, in your grief, be surprised to find out who really and truly shows up for you, and equally as surprised who isn’t there for you. Grief often separates the men from the boys and the fair weather ones from the pals who are willing to put on metaphorical galoshes and gloves to be there with you in the puddles. It is a good thing to know who your real friends really are and grief can really teach you that.

3. A greater awareness of how fleeting life isWe all know that we aren’t going to live forever, and that, in fact, nothing lasts forever. Right? Only, we can know it and we also don’t really know it. Loss can bring that reality home like nothing else can. It is an important lesson to get because life is precious and fragile and it doesn’t last forever. Really and truly getting this lesson can get us engaged with our life and inspire us to treat it like the time-limited treasure that it is and ultimately to live more fully. 

4. Awareness of what really matters to youA list of things we don’t grieve ending: tax days, root canals, colonoscopies, being stuck in an elevator, and lice. No, we grieve losses of things we like, love, brought us hope, happiness, or potential happiness( in the case of dreams). Grief means you cared and I am guessing if I could offer you the option of ending your grief at the small cost of no longer caring about or loving the beloved love, pet, job, or dream, it is my hunch you would prefer to hold onto the love and deal with the resulting grief than to no longer care. You may not need grief to teach you this lesson---you may have known this. But, no matter, grief is your psyches way of reminding you just how much and how deeply you cared and and that is an important truth. 

5. Learning you are able to endure more than you imaginedIf I told you a year ago that you were going to lose the job, this relationship, this person in your life, or whatever it is that you like, very likely you would have imagined that you would simply not have been able to handle it and might have gone as far as predicting that you would completely and totally fall apart, never laugh again and be totally unable to find anything good about life for now until eternity. However, I am guessing, you likely have laughed again, and you are still standing and working and doing stuff. Yes, of course, you are hurting, but you are, dear you, you are surviving. 

6. Feelings changeI like to think of feelings as weather as opposed to geography. Weather, to state the obvious, is constantly changing and we are okay with that.  We certainly don’t expect it to always be 70 degrees and sunny, that would be an absurd expectation. However, with feelings we may expect that we should always be the emotional equivalent of that kind of sunny---yet we don’t. And when we are in grief, very often, people predict that they will “always feel this way”. Alas, grief is an unpredictable rollercoaster of denial, sadness, despair, shame, anger, guilt, envy, and hopelessness.  Your feelings will change and you won’t feel this way forever, you may not know that yet—but grief will teach you this lesson.

7. Hugs helpCheery clichés and trite truths like “it’s darkest before dawn” do not help. When people drop the need to cheer and instead put their arms around us and say they are sorry that we are going through this---it helps. Well, of course, it doesn’t help in terms of bringing back what we have lost, but it is a comfort and a real comfort that is more healing than any well meaning advice.

About the AuthorTracey Cleantis, LMFT, is a speaker, writer and a practicing psychotherapist. She is the “Dr. Kevorkian of Dreams” and  is a personal and professional authority on how to let go of what isn’t working and to grieve, move on, and get to the to the other side where happiness is waiting for you.

Her blog was named one of the top ten blogs for Francophiles by Blogs.com and is rated one of the top 10 psychology and memoir blogs. In addition, Tracey has written “Freudian Sip,” a column atPsychology Today, and contributes to the Huffington Post. She has been featured on Fox News and in Redbook, Yahoo News and Salon.com. Her writing on finding happiness after infertility was featured in Jamie Cat Callan’s Bonjour, Happiness! (Citadel Press, 2011).

Tracey is a passionate writer who combines wit, wisdom, humor, theory made accessible, and a whole lot of heart. She speaks on grief, infertility, letting go of dreams, finding unexpected happiness after loss.

Follow Tracey on Facebook and Twitter!

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Are you a good listener?

7/25/2014

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A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something.
--Wilson Mizner

A good salesperson is usually a good listener. Being a good listener also helps in being a good parent or spouse, neighbor or friend. When we are truly able to hear what others are trying to say, we are better able to enter their world, and let them into ours.

Listening to the collective wisdom of others helps us gain understanding and perspective on the world around us. When it comes to recovery from a life-threatening illness like addiction, listening to others who are in recovery is like receiving a gift of ideas.

It is not always easy to listen, because it's often our nature to want to be the center of attention. But listening is an art worth developing. It enriches our lives, improves our relationships, and helps us feel better about ourselves.

Today may I enrich my spiritual life by listening to others.
You are reading from the book:



Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

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Help Wanted!

7/21/2014

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Opening for Case Managers and Professional Staff in our Durant Office. Please call 580-286-3301 or 800-590-3301. LPC, LADC, LCSW or applicants able to apply for supervision. 
 
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And if not now, when? --The Talmud

7/9/2014

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It's so easy to put things off. Sometimes we're like Scarlet O'Hara, who hoped and dreamed for a better life by saying, "There's always tomorrow." But is there always a tomorrow? If we live too many of our days counting on tomorrows, we may find ourselves putting off achievements and growth now.

What if tomorrow never came? What if all of our time to do what we wanted was put in the hours left in today? We'd be scurrying around like mice trying to cram as much as we could into this short period of time. But today, not having such a deadline, we believe our time is endless and no goal or task is so important that it can't be put off.

The time to achieve is now. The time to live is now. For as long as we believe tomorrow will come, we'll be living for tomorrow. If we don't believe today is the greatest gift we could receive, we'll never know how to live for today. Everything we want to achieve, to learn, to share can begin today. If we don't live the best we can right now, then when?

Higher Power, help me learn to use my time wisely. Help me avoid putting things off.





You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean



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Turning It Over

5/27/2014

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Each morning sees some task begin,
Each evening sees it close;
Something attempted, something done,
Has earned a night's repose.

--Longfellow


Every day for us is a period of spiritual growth. Restful sleep prepares us for fruitful days. As each day begins, a new adventure in growth lies ahead. We seek strength and an attitude of making our lives more meaningful and positive through prayer and meditation at the start of each new day during our quiet time. We prepare ourselves emotionally for the busy hours ahead.

With positive action planned ahead, we arise to a day dedicated to accomplishment. We know we have little time for standing and idly staring. We accept new challenges as we carry out each day's plans. We encourage those around us to join us in seeking to see the best in everything that makes up our daily lives.

Restful sleep, meditation, planning, and "turning it over" starts my day with a quiet time and keeps it manageable.


You are reading from the book:
Easy Does It by Anonymous



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